The Poop Deck

My deck is just as important as my front porch. It is an extension of my home, a part of who I am, and a place I like spending time on. In all kinds of weather, well almost.The deck was added to our home shortly after we moved in, as a necessity. There was simply no place to wash 8 large paws (we had only two dogs at the time, and I have no idea how that number grew to four) that were caked with wet dirt (also known as mud) before said paws came into the house. Therefore, in an effort to make me happy, the deck was designed and built.

This would not be the first deck built by my family, nor the last. So after assembling my siblings and their tools, the deck was completed in two weekends. After waiting a specified amount of time (I did however fudge the numbers, the number of hours we had to wait for the wood to do something, before we could stain it), the deck was stained and prepared for the rough winter that lie ahead.

Now the color of the deck is an interesting brown, which complements the siding of our home. The neighbors that used to live to the left, referred to it as a "poopy brown" color. We referred to them as idiots that lack class and an eye for color. The same color adorns an arbor my husband made for me, and our little shed in the back of the yard. It works well. I believe. I think Martha might even be proud. (Stewart)

The deck is a decent size; 24 by 16. Not too big, not too small, just right. I have tables and comfortable chairs for anyone to rest in when they stop for a visit. I even have a huge swing that grabs hold of you and will not let go. Of course, I have flowers and plants that add a splash of color, which is obviously needed according to the neighbors that used to live to the left. It has has a warm feeling.

I love it best early in the morning when the area is quiet and the birds are singing their best. It's peaceful. It's relaxing. It's who I am. Poopy color and all.

It's Time

It is that time of year, when the birds return from the warmth of the south to nest, feed, and do what birds do. If you know me at all, or have paid attention to my blog, you know I love my humming birds. I wait and watch for them to return to my feeders each spring.

The birds have their migratory patterns, and I have my maps. I have several friends and family who love the birds as well. We call out to each other letting each other know when we have sighted the birds. I know that if my friends to the north have seen them, then I had better get my feeders out. If I see the birds, I call my friends to the south and let them know. Like the birds, we look out for each other. It’s the way it should be.

Where's the Justice?

In all my years as an OB nurse, I have seen so many wonderful births, making my job one of the best out there. Yet there are times I think to myself, this job sucks, and it has nothing to do with the workload.

It's about the patient who waits years (15 in this case) to have a baby, and when it happens, the baby is sick and needs so much in the first few hours of birth. It doesn't seem fair. It doesn't seem right. I also question the judgment of the decisions made before this baby was born. No one is perfect, but did you make the right decision? I don't think so, and now this mom is hurting and is afraid, and her beautiful baby gets a crappy start.

Delta Gamma Dump

As a parent, who is helping her kids through college, be it through tuition help, sending care packages, and wherever else I can help them financially, I am pleased to know that Caitlin is thriving at school, and is learning so much! Learning does not always have to be done in the classroom either. She is lucky, as she is not only learning about animal related things, but a new culture, as well. There is no way you can place a dollar value on living abroad in another culture!

In addition, the learning does not stop there. She thought she knew all there was to know about living with someone you hardly know, because she did that when she went to Rutgers. Her first roommate had much to offer Caitlin. There was the how many ways can I hide a boy in the bed so you can’t see him...how many boys I can do in one week and can you really do the math to keep track...the list is endless.

Then she moved into a house with 6 girls and thought it might be better. She learned that girls can in fact be nasty and dirty...that bongs come in many designs...that it is possible to go through every dish in the house and still survive...that despite charts and graphs on walls deciding who does what and when (house chores) really is useless...

She recently shared with me how much she has learned about living with a single roommate (which she thought was going to be easier than living with 6 other girls). Bless her heart... In her own words...

1. Spaghetti sauce naturally blends in with a cream yellow rug. No one will notice, right? Shabby Chic on the Style channel has taught me nothing!! Must not watch Style anymore.

2. Hand towels are used for wiping up everything and are definitely not supposed to be used to wipe your hands after you've just washed them. Duh, how could I be so retarded? Like why would I want to use a clean one vs. one with crap all over it? Smack me.

3. You should ALWAYS, always spill, splatter, drip, dribble the contents of whatever food you are making all over the counter, sink, clean dishes....and hell why not make it go to the far side of the kitchen. Score more points that way, right? Ya know, if you can make something go further than were it actually started. PS spaghetti sauce works the best - definitely goes further and that equals more points! BONUS! Now I know why I don't have fun in the kitchen.

4. Oh, food must be made, eaten, but make sure enough is left out in the open for critters and others to see. Vet students love critters and they all need to eat, right?

5. Dog/beach towels need to be randomly thrown or piled up in the middle of the floor. Ugh and to think I was doing well by folding them and tucking them out of sight. Smack me again.

6. Hair brushes do not belong in the bathroom or bedroom anymore. Why has no one told me this? Gosh, I thought I was hair and makeup savvy??? Apparently, the new spot is in the sink! Alert Cosmo everyone, pronto! We are all wrong!

7. I'm not much of a drinker, but dude, did you know that you HAVE to buy a whole brand new bottle of ANYTHING and have drunk before the next day or leave a swig in there for the morning??? Wow, that is an accomplishment! What have I been missing all these years?? I could have drank the rock stars I worked with under the table and been totally cool! Fantabulous!

8. It's ok to be a guy, not pay rent or bills here, not clean up your mess, and get wasted on the foam cushion couch, but still leave the toilet seat up and have it be acceptable. Wow, the guys who didn't do this, who slept with the girls at the Rutgers house, were such slobs because even they left the toilet seat DOWN. I think I just said something nice about Rutgers!

9. BBQ grills make a great ashtray for cigarettes! I didn't know that tobacco was a good smoke flavor in your steak or chicken.

10. This place is just too cool for more facts!

I believe the child has gotten her money's worth in education.

Spring has Sprung!

I was out doing some light raking, mostly meandering in the yard with the rake in my hands, looking like I was raking, and I noticed that my flowers are bursting forth! Yeah! The forsythia is also budding, and with the chirping of the birds, I felt hopeful that winter was on its way out. I am glad.

It really has not been a long winter, but I really want warmer weather, and soon. I long for the days of just sitting out on my deck, taking in the sun. I love my deck. I love being out on the patio, in the yard, and even on my hammock. The place is not as important as being out. I have not felt this much cabin fever in a long time.

I cannot wait to start planting my potted plants, which decorate the deck and the patio areas. My deck will need a new coat of stain, but I even look forward to getting that done. I also look forward to getting my herb garden going, and my veggies planted. I guess I just want to play in the dirt, and soon.

Well, spring sprang. We've had our state of grace and our little gift of sanctioned madness, courtesy of Mother Nature. Thanks, Gaia. Much obliged. I guess it's time to get back to that daily routine of living we like to call normal.
~David Assael, Northern Exposure, Spring Break, 1991

Me? A Pediatric Nurse?

I have been cross training to the area of pediatrics over the last month or so. It's being done because the administrator wants us to cross train to the other areas on the fifth floor, and because we are heavily staffed in L&D, and the census has been low. I could have picked postpartum or the nursery, but I have experience in those areas and thought something new might be fun. Fun? Different.

I did do some "Pedi Time" at my last job in a hospital in PA where I worked, but needed to have a refresher, so I raised my hand to go to this area. I am all about making myself more marketable anyway, especially these days when everything in health care is so damn unstable. It's not such a bad little place. The staff have been friendly and I have learned a few new things. Of course, I have also learned that everywhere one goes (other units), most (other nurses) are miserable these days with the uncertainty hanging over our heads.

So now I have another area I can tack on my resume, NOT that I will be seeking Pedi nurse jobs in the near future. Trust me. But I can say that the gig is not so bad. If I had to, I could be a pedi nurse. Maybe. Ok, maybe just a little.

Bonnie and Clyde

I would have loved the opportunity to spend time with these two characters, for at least a day. Can you believe this May 23rd marks the 75th Anniversayof the day the two were ambushed! Where has time gone?

Wouldn't you love the chance to hang with them? What went on their heads? Why did they go on the killing sprees they did? Bonnie was so young! How does a 23 year old become so infected with that much rage? Of course, they did supply the nation with a lot of entertainment at a time when things were bad, real bad. Kind of like today. "They were front-page news, newsreel stars, heroes to those who hated banks and the government, institutions the young outlaws mocked." Kind of like today.

Is there a Bonnie and Clyde out there. Waiting. Watching.

Bewarned. I am not kidding.

I am no longer paying for health insurance. I will be using your Emergency Department like a doctors office. The wait will not bother me. I love to read. I will bring books and snacks. In fact, I may even pack a cooler. I can sit there all day if I have to and YOU cannot turn me away.

I will no longer be paying for everyone's treatment. I will be right there along side of them sucking YOUR hard earned dollars away from you so I can get my head cold taken care of, or that hammer toe fixed. I may even think about having another baby. Why not, YOU will be paying for it. Makes sense to me.

Who needs health care insurance?

No Money, No Bones

I recently was made aware that because we are facing a huge financial problem in this country, people now have to choose between feeding themselves and feeding their pets. There are also those people facing the issue of “do I get care for my pet, or don’t I?” Vet visits are down, which is certainly no fun for their businesses, but I am more concerned about the animals being dumped. It is not something I have never had to think about, nor would I want to face that issue. I would certainly explore every option I could first.

The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals recently estimated that up to 1 million cats and dogs nationwide “are at risk of becoming homeless as a result of the continuing economic downturn.” Shelters across the country are busting at the seams, which only leads to more animals being needlessly euthanized. I find that sad.

I hope that people explore every option possible before ‘dumping’ their pets. Please.

Are You a Foodie?

Being a “gourmet” or “epicure” is passé. Those of us who are now into the world of food are now called “foodies”. I am a foodie. However, I am not alone. There are many of us out there. YOU could be a foodie.

Foodies are defined as “someone who has an ardent or refined interest in food”. Once being thought of as snobby people who could only eat expensive foods, served on the best of china, in refined restaurants, this thinking is no longer valid. Foodies can find something good on a roadside stand in the middle of nowhere and want to know all there is to know about the food, where it comes from, and who made it. We thirst for as much knowledge about food as we can get.

There are some basic traits of being a foodie, as there are basic traits that come with all labels. Generally, you have to know what you like, why you like it, recognize why some foods are better than others and want to have good tasting food all or certainly most of the time. This doesn't mean that you can't eat flaming hot Cheetos every now and again, but it does mean that you don't fool yourself into thinking that it's a nutritionally balanced meal. A foodie is someone who has to know the difference between a beefsteak tomato and a Jersey Tomato, and then wants to try them both to understand the difference.

There might be foods you simply will not try or weird foods you simply have to eat. This is what makes you more of a foodie. The important thing is that you like food, want to know more about food, and in the end enjoying eating the food. My addiction, besides food, is food blogs. I cannot get enough of them.

I Need Spring!

"Whose woods these are I think I know. His house is in the village though; he will not see me stopping here. To watch his woods fill up with snow." ~ Robert Frost

I need spring.

I am so tired of this cold weather. I am tired of my winter looking surroundings, no green, bare trees, and frosted grass. I yearn for the greens, the colors, the feel, and smell of spring. I want to feel warm sun. I want to sit on my deck. I want to be out for long periods of time without feeling cold.

I need spring.

I want to plant flowers, sow grass (yes, thanks to Meego), and play in the dirt. I want to fill my deck pots with pretty flowers. I want to see green grass, and the little yellow flowers of my forsythia bushes. I want to spend time on my patio, relaxing on a lounger.

I need spring.

Keeping Secrets

Can you keep a secret? I can, but obviously, you can’t. What is about people who claim they can keep something private and to themselves, only to find out that they “thought it would be okay to share with so and so” and that I wouldn’t mind?? What the heck? And if you are telling me a secret that someone else asked you to keep private, then obviously I cannot trust you either. What part about secret and private don’t you get??

I realize that for many secrets are difficult to keep. If I want to ensure privacy, I’d better just keep my thoughts and feelings to myself. In addition, I would expect that if you wish to remain my friend, you’d better keep my thoughts and feelings I share with you, private, especially after I asked you to do so. Thank you.

Miserable People

I am so sorry that someone, somewhere pissed in your oatmeal, but please keep it to yourself.

Nuff said.

Aishiteru*

Ask any self-respecting Japanese woman what she has planned for Valentine's, and she'll tell you that it's all been set — the chocolates, gifts, and dinner, all prepared and paid for, by her. On Barentain Dei, women take the initiative to shower their honmei or sweethearts with gifts, profess their love, and humor their male classmates and colleagues with giri-choco or obligation chocolates. For teenagers it's a bittersweet initiation into romance and courtship, where girls brave a few burns to learn the art of tempering molten chocolate to create one-of-a-kind treats for the captain of the baseball team. For the more weathered, it's about raiding Godiva for their lovers and husbands, and picking up cheaper consolation prizes for the lesser males in their lives. The men, by the way, don’t have to do a thing for the women on Feb. 14. Not till Mar. 14, but more on that later.

How a lovers' holiday in the west turned into a quasi-feminist chocolate orgy is unclear. The the first Valentine's sale in Japan took place in 1958 and Tokyo chocolatier Mary Chocolate's event generated 150 yen total in sales (the company sold three bars of chocolate in three days). Nevertheless, the marketing opportunity would not be lost in translation.

Men do not get an entirely free ride. In the late 1970s a number of confectionary company CEOs got together to try to figure out how to get a piece of the chocolate pie. Their equal opportunity marketing gimmick was to come up with "White Day" on March 14th, where the men are obliged to reciprocate for their Valentine's gifts by purchasing candies and cookies. Easy enough? Well, maybe not. Expectations have grown since the 70s. According the polls, what women expect on White Day, in order of preference, are jewelry, watches, and handbags. Van cleef & Arpels, Cartier and Louis Vuitton are not complaining.

Love equals money no matter the culture.

*Aishiteru means I Love You.

Self- Doubt

I have been chasing the dream of teaching nursing for quite some time. I really want the chance to help my profession grow through helping others reach their dreams of becoming nurses. I want to make a difference. You can’t do it unless you have a degree. Unfortunately.

I love being in school, although lately it has been quite a personal challenge. I have stumbled in the past, but have managed to breeze through each class and quite well. Lately, I keep wondering if perhaps I was not meant to teach. It is hard, sometimes, to believe in your ability to be or do everything you dream about and even the most determined person has their dark moments. I hate self-doubt.

Self Doubt: A lack of faith or confidence in oneself.

That is what I have. That is where I am at right now. I hear the little voices in my head (not really, please do not call the mental health police) saying that maybe I'm not good enough, not smart enough, or not talented enough to be a good teacher. Where does this self-doubt come from? I am hoping it is a little speed bump. I have no time for self-doubt right now. I have to get through this damn class.

Self-doubt is the little voice in your head saying " You Can Do It!" and the big voice saying " I Wish You Would"...listen to the little voice” ~Sean O’Donnell

What a Tease!

I am tired of the cold, the mud, the ice, the snow (even the pitiful amounts), and the dreary winter days. I am now ready for the warmth and renewal of spring.

Yesterday it warmed a wee bit (51 here), and I was out with the pups when a damn Robin flew in the yard, sitting there, with it's smug little attitude. Normally they remind us that spring is right around the corner, but being the realistic person I am, I know it isn't. There are still many winter days ahead.

Dumb bird.

No More Ashes, No more Soot....

We gave the wood logs a big fat boot!

With my direction (and I am good at that), Jim turned our wood burning fireplace into a gas burning one, and I love it! No more dirty ashes, no more tiny wood chips, no more kindling be dragged around the house (haha Meego!), and a relatively sparkling glass front!

And I can easily hit the remote and start a fire, without having to wait for Jim or one of the kids to do it for me! With the prices of firewood going up constantly, and the places to even go and get our own wood dwindling (WHO is buying into all these new develpments?), not to mention our getting too old to haul, chop, and split wood, it was time! Thankfully Jim is talented enough to do the work, so it was relatively cheap to do. And it looks so pretty.

I love my new fireplace logs!

False Promises (Again)

I am so tired of being promised that we will get snow and then a big nothing. I like the snow. I like watching it fall from the sky, and blanketing the ground, making everything so pretty. However, if we are not going to get snow, in any amount (one inch does not count), then let us just move onto spring. I have things that need to be done outside (more leaves and sticks out front).

I miss the winters I had as kid. I remember a ton of snow and many school closings. What happened to all that snow? (Shhh, I know about global warming, just let me reminisce here). I grew up in a house that sat on a hill, so when we had snow, we had major fun. Our house sat across the street from Deal Lake, and there were times we could start at the top of the driveway, fly down across the street, and down another hill and onto the lake. NOW that was snow!

Moreover, it lasted. We did not have a few hours of snow and then rain and it was gone. We had good snow, healthy snow, snow that lasted and lasted. Where is that snow? We had the kind of snow that provided my brothers with serious income from hours and hours of shoveling storefronts and people’s driveways. We had the kind of snow that required tons of extra mittens and snow pants. Snow pants! What kids have to wear them today when it snows? No one.

I wish for a major snow episode. An old-fashioned blizzard. No more false promises. Get serious mother nature.

Spring Clean Up in February

We have had this tiny little spurt of warmer air. Okay, 49 degrees, but warmer than 20. I have felt stuck in this house, glued to my laptop, getting through mounds of reading, researching, and writing. (I feel as if my MSN is now in sight, finally!) So when the weather turned favorably, I got out.

Of course, it is not in my nature to just go out and relax. I got the idea to remove the left over firewood from the shed yesterday (we are going from wood to gas), and then clean up the shed. Since the shed was no longer going to store wood, I thought we could use the shed as a shed. So it was then time to move the yard tools from the garage to the shed, freeing up more space in the garage. And since the rake was now out, why not just tidy up the backyard. Some 6 large bags later, and the yard is tidy. The sticks gone (for now) so no more chewed up littlier sticks. (got dogs, got little chewed up sticks). I then thought why not tidy up the patio (just in case the weather really got warm and we might want to have a barbeque). Chairs moved out, broom in. One more bag of leaves. Then while I was there Ithought I would clean up under the sink in the outdoor kitchen. HOW do leaves get in there? Makes no sense.

I will tell you here that while it seems the cleaning was effortless, I had the help of four goldens. Nothing is easy when they pitch in and help. And not once, but twice, did I have to chase Migo to get my gardening gloves back.

Then it was on to the garage. Broom out, half a bag of leaves. How the hell do all those leaves get in there? Loads of space!

Now my back hurts and there is snow coming. No barbeque. Colder weather. Breaktime over. Back to the books. Hurry Spring!

111 Scarves

It seems that knitting takes away my stress. I have discovered that after spending hours (hours and hours and hours) of doing schoolwork, I can feel quite stressed out. I recently began to knit when taking breaks from the research, reading, and writing. I noticed that because knitting takes little thought, I was able to relax, clear my head, and head back to the schoolwork feeling better.

I am not a talented knitter. I know one stitch. This is okay because the one stitch makes great scarves. I like the pretty wools that are available and have been able to make some nice gifts. It takes me roughly 3 days to make one scarf. I have approximately 333 days until I finish with my degree. If I continue at the same pace, I will make 111 scarves by graduation (math skills). That is many scarves (general observation).

Not a bad thing. Less stress. More gifts.